Mundane but Real

Goofy Gifts

2012-01-09T21:08:00.000-06:00

Mike always goes shopping on Christmas Eve. The joke is that he doesn't buy my gifts until that day. This past Christmas, he asked if there was anything he could pick up while he was out and about. I asked if he could buy a few small items to drop in the stockings. He decided that whoopee cushions, Flarp (putty that is used to make fart noises), and bendy drinking straws were the perfect items for our nieces, who are ages 4 and 7.

He was right. They were huge hits. They played with those items more on Christmas Day than the other gifts they opened. I've learned their parents have since bought more Flarp. The fun continues.

Next year I need to remember the gifts that cost less than $5 were the biggest hits.

Taz and the Orange Chair

2012-01-06T09:26:00.000-06:00

Mike and I own this orange chair. It started life in the late 60s, right around the same time Mike was born. It had a matching 7 foot couch. Mike's parents purchased the set new. It started its life orange.

We inherited both the couch and chair when we got married. It moved to Virginia with us, and found new life in the family room of our townhouse where it hosted the occasional Navy guy and put up with our four pets. The couch did not make the move back to Illinois, but the chair did. It got recovered in a deep green, and joined our living room furniture.

Fast forward a few years, and that chair got recovered again - back to a rusty orange color. It's been knocked around different rooms, in different places, and usually ends up in a corner.

Here's the thing: it's not one of my favorite furniture pieces. I actually think it's a bit ugly. It is, however, comfortable....... especially to the cat. Taz has completely claimed this chair. It doesn't matter where I move it. Considering I'd rather have him occupying that particular chair than one of our good chairs, I think I'll leave it where it is. Even if it does make the room a bit crowded.

2011 Escapes - Actual Places!

2012-01-05T21:26:00.002-06:00

San Francisco. Work.

Atlanta. Work. Really!

Denver. Work.

The Windy City! A trip to see A Christmas Story, the Musical.

Vegas, Baby! A combo of work & personal.

Vegas, again. Work trip.

Bus trip to Lake Geneva. Totally work, totally fun.

Second trip to Wizard Academy, for Money & Cool Chicks. Met awesome, fantastic, wonderful people.

First Vegas trip of the year. Checked out the new bridge by the Hoover Dam.

Florida. Shuttle launch. A once-in-a-lifetime experience.


1st trip to Wizard Academy, Austin. New worlds of wonder.

Austin, Florida, Denver, Vegas, Atlanta, Vegas, San Francisco, Lake Geneva, Vegas, Austin, Chicago. Busy year.

Yep, It's Cool In Here

2012-01-04T20:54:00.000-06:00

This is Roo. She's getting up there in age now, 15 and a half years old. She's a bit cranky at times, but still a sweetheart. Apparently she doesn't like that we keep the house around 60 degrees........... she likes to belly up to the heat register in the guest bathroom.

2011 Escapes: The Book Version

2012-01-02T19:55:00.001-06:00

Looking through the list of fiction books I read in 2011, it is heavy in the urban fantasy genre. Apparently I prefer the company of witches, vampires, werewolves and fairies in my off time.

As a side note, I really like the new feature of Amazon Prime that allows book borrowing.

The stories that have stuck in my mind are the books of the Song of Ice and Fire, by George R.R. Martin. I did not realize the series was not yet complete when I started reading A Game of Thrones. If I had realized, I would have waited.

The Deadliest Bite, Jennifer Rardin
The Silence of Trees, Valya Dudycz Lupescu
Drink Deep: A Chicagoland Vampires Novel, Chloe Neill
A Reckless Witch (A Modern Witch, Book 3), Debora Geary
Black Night (Black Wings), Christina Henry
A Hidden Witch (A Modern Witch, Book 2), Debora Geary
Chasing Amanda, Melissa Foster
What-the-Dickens: The Story of a Rogue Tooth Fairy, Gregory Maguire
Black Wings, Christina Henry
Mile 81, Stephen King
A Modern Witch (A Modern Witch Series: Book 1), Debora Geary
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, Ransom Riggs
Grave Dance: An Alex Craft Novel, Kalayna Price
Succubus Revealed (Georgina Kincaid), Richelle Mead
Bloodlines, Richelle Mead
The Night Circus, Erin Morgenstern
The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake: A Novel, Aimee Bender
Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
Magic Slays (Kate Daniels), Ilona Andrews
Tommy Nightmare (The Paranormals, Book 2), JL Bryan
A Dance with Dragons: A Song of Ice and Fire: Book Five, George R.R. Martin
Jenny Pox (The Paranormals, Book 1), JL Bryan
Ascend (Trylle Trilogy, #3), Amanda Hocking
Torn (Trylle Trilogy, Book 2), Amanda Hocking
Beautiful Darkness (Beautiful Creatures, Book 2), Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl
A Feast for Crows: A Song of Ice and Fire: Book Four, George R.R. Martin
A Storm of Swords: A Song of Ice and Fire: Book Three, George R.R. Martin
A Clash of Kings: A Song of Ice and Fire: Book Two, George R.R. Martin
A Game of Thrones: A Song of Ice and Fire: Book One, George R.R. Martin
Hard Bitten: A Chicagoland Vampires Novel, Chloe Neill
Dead Reckoning: A Sookie Stackhouse Novel, Charlaine Harris
Kill&Cure, Stephen Davison
Demon Song (The Blood Singer Series), Cat Adams
Iron Crowned (Dark Swan), Richelle Mead
Room: A Novel, Emma Donoghue
Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet: A Novel, Jamie Ford
The Hangman's Daughter, Oliver Potzsch and Lee Chadeayne
Practical Magic, Alice Hoffman
Camille, Tess Oliver
Grave Witch: An Alex Craft Novel, Kalayna Price
Arcane Circle, Linda Robertson
The Ritual Bath, Faye Kellerman
Hollowland (The Hollows, #1), Amanda Hocking
Letters to Elise: A Peter Townsend Novella (My Blood Approves), Amanda Hocking
Wisdom (My Blood Approves, #4), Amanda Hocking
Flutter (My Blood Approves, Book 3), Amanda Hocking
A Secret Rage, Charlaine Harris
Sweet and Deadly, Charlaine Harris
Carmilla, Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu

Chocolate and Child Slavery

2011-12-12T21:22:00.000-06:00

Like many Americans, I grew up eating - and loving - chocolate. I still love chocolate. The smell of it, the texture, the varying degrees of sweetness. From the lovely, sophisticated dark chocolate that kisses your tastebuds and leaves you wanting more to the sweet, simple milk chocolate that melts so smoothly, I enjoy it all. My favorite cake is one of my grandmother's recipes, a dark chocolate cake. I prefer it without frosting.

This year, the week before Halloween, I received a bit of a revelation in my email inbox. In trying to practice gratefulness and thankfulness, I had subscribed to an email feed called The Daily GOOD, from the magazine GOOD. The subject line that caught my eye? Child Slaves Made Your Halloween Candy. Stop Buying It.

I admit my first inclination was towards skepticism; but I was disturbed enough that I researched a bit more. I found that the taint of child slavery in the chocolate trade is a very real issue.

So now what? I decided to give up chocolate, unless it is Fair Trade. Not a difficult decision when I think about children as young as 6 suffering just so I can have an inexpensive candy bar. I expected to miss some of my favorites. I expected to find it difficult to source Fair Trade chocolate. I expected to pay more for chocolate.

What I did not expect: the reactions others have had to my decision.

If I had simply stated I was giving up chocolate as part of a diet, no one would say much..... or they would be cheerleaders. Saying I was changing my eating habits because of child slavery? People have repeatedly told me I'm naive if I think I can change an entire industry by myself.

Guess what? I'm not trying to change the industry by myself. I'm simply choosing not to support a way of doing business that I find unethical, and at the core, immoral. If my choice causes someone else to take a closer look, good.

I was fortunate enough - lucky - to be born in the United States of America. I had a childhood. I knew my cousins, aunts, and uncles. I had my own bedroom in a decent house, with three meals a day and snacks. I had clothes to wear. I got an education. I never had to worry about being snatched off the street and sold into slavery.

If this subject makes you uncomfortable, I refuse to apologize. Close the page if you want. It won't make the problem disappear.

Swimming Upstream

2011-10-08T22:25:00.000-05:00

I feel like I'm swimming upstream lately. Anyone who knows me well knows that swimming in general is an absolutely terrifying thing for me - one of my greatest fears is water.

I'm trying to stay focused on what really matters. I'm also trying to think about the things that I'm grateful to have in my life. It's helping, somewhat, but I'm still feeling pushed downstream, barely treading water.

The things that are overwhelming me are the same things every other human being deals with: work, family, friends, money, health, time..... Normally, I'm ok juggling a few problems. They're usually not that heavy, you see. Add a heavy issue to the mix, and it gets a bit harder. Add two or more..... Well, that's when I find myself thinking of water. And swimming. And how important it is not to fail.

When you're stressed and overwhelmed, what images come to your mind?

Ch Ch Ch Changes........

2011-09-16T22:09:00.000-05:00

The last few months have been interesting. On September 9th, the first day of my tenth year of FatWallet employment, the company was acquired by Performance Marketing Brands, which is now a parent company to FatWallet, Ebates and AnyCoupons. After a flurry of questions, providing information and feeling like we were in limbo, we finally get to move forward. The possibilities and opportunities are pretty exciting.

New ownership naturally means a shift in how I think about where I work. I have quite a bit of logo-wear, so I'm used to answering questions about FatWallet when I'm out and about. On a recent flight, the person in the seat next to me asked, "So what is FatWallet?" After my normal elevator pitch, he said, "I'll have to have my wife check it out. She loves to coupon and save money." I found myself telling him that maybe she should try Ebates first, as that site is a bit more female-friendly. This led to a conversation about the differences in the sites, FatWallet's great electronics deals, and the tv he's thinking about buying soon.

I've been a loyal FatWallet employee and customer for so long, it wouldn't be surprising to me if I bled green (one of the colors we frequently use and associate with the brand). Just three weeks ago, I would not have had this conversation (suggest a competitor? No way!). Anyone who knows me well knows I hate to fly. This conversation, which was friendly and fun, helped me to relax a bit. Hello change!

Why, Walmart? Why? Next Time, Target.

2011-09-03T14:37:00.000-05:00

I've spent my day sticking donation tags on items for Chemo Cargo tote bags, and making a run to Walmart for large plastic bins to store said tote bags. Why couldn't Target have built a store a block away from me instead of Walmart? I end up frustrated and sorry I ever set foot in the door about 50% of the time I walk into a Walmart. You'd think I'd learn not to go there. This morning I told myself that it was only for plastic bins, how bad could it be?

On a Saturday, don't you think they could have more than 4 registers open in a Walmart super store? Seriously? And of course 2 of the lines open are 20 items or less, one line sells cigarettes, and the other line is on the grocery side. I only had 12 items, but the darn lines were just so long. I waited longer in line - much longer - than I spent walking in, getting a cart, getting my items, and walking to the front of the store.

Next time, I'm definitely going to Target. They have better shopping carts, too.

http://onmilwaukee.com/market/articles/newtargetcarts.html

Ask Your Doctor Questions.

2011-07-26T22:46:00.001-05:00

One of the things my doctors discussed with me before I started chemotherapy was how likely it was my cancer would recur. With my particular type, uterine papillary serous carcinoma, I was told the recurrence percentage was between 40 and 50 percent if I didn't have chemo or radiation. If I chose treatment, it would be for curative purposes, dropping the possible recurrence rate to under 5 percent. The other thing they told me was that if I didn't have treatment and I did have a recurrence, I would be looking at palliative options versus curative.

Palliative, in general terms, refers to care that alleviates symptoms, whether or not there is hope of cure. It's a focus on quality of life. Making patients comfortable. Curative means able to heal or cure. Big difference.

I've been thinking about the types of things I believe patients should ask at their first oncology appointments, and why. The why is easy: no one cares about your health or treatment more than you and your loved ones. Your healthcare providers are, in a roundabout way, your employees. They're doing a job. Here are the questions I'd ask:

What is my specific type of cancer?
What is the stage (a description of the extent the cancer has spread)?
What is the grade (a measure of how aggressive the cancer is)?
What treatment are you proposing?
Is the treatment curative, or simply palliative?
If chemo is proposed, what specific drug regimen?

The rest of your questions will likely be based on the answers you get to these inquiries.

I was lucky to hear my doctors were proposing chemo as a curative option. I don't take it for granted. It's one of the reasons I founded Chemo Cargo. Really, the main reason. If you haven't heard of it, you can learn more at Chemo Cargo.

When Friends Divorce, Who Gets You?

2011-07-10T10:53:00.001-05:00

When a friend finds that certain someone, starts dating, and introduces him or her around, you will most likely extend your friendship to the new person. What happens when they break up? After a month, it's not so big a deal. You go back to the way things were. After a decade or two of marriage, it's a lot harder. Lives and families are intertwined.

You may think that the divorce is just between the two of them, and logically you should be able to maintain friendships with both. Realistically, face it: you're part of the divorce settlement. Your name may not be on the paperwork, but it will shake out that you land on one side or the other, at least for awhile.

Those quirky things that happened between them when they were married? Not so quirky anymore. Any dysfunctions that existed in communication - either what they had with each other or how they communicated with you - are amplified. You can easily become collateral damage.

Do yourself a favor: get out of the line of fire. Unless you choose, you are in the middle. Don't be. Choose a side and let it play to whatever end there will be. It may not be fair, but life isn't fair.

photo credit: dreamstime

Selfless, Selfish, Somewhere Between

2011-07-01T23:10:00.001-05:00

I'm pretty sure my DNA contains something that compels me to try to help people. At the same time, I'm shy and uncomfortable around anyone I don't know well. It can be a strange combination at times. Part of me wants to walk over to the elderly lady in the checkout line and help her carry her bags to her car, yet another part curls into myself and hopes I can scurry out of the store unnoticed. What I know for sure is the dichotomy of the two compulsions breeds feelings of guilt.

My dad is one of those people who will help any of his friends with any project he can. He'll lend anything he owns. He's shy, but gives freely of himself to those he knows. Growing up seeing this generosity of his time and resources on a daily basis taught me some lessons. Some were the types of life lessons you'd expect: giving has its own rewards, most people are inherently kind, and you don't need a lot of money to help others. One other lesson came from the other side of the coin: people will disappoint you. Sometimes over and over.

I do try to help others, but it's hard for me to know where the line is. When should I take a step back and start protecting myself from the people who disappoint me? Is it selfish to think along those lines? If it's just time, is it that big of a deal? If we're talking about stuff I don't get back, it's just stuff...... is it worth altering a friendship? Is it a friendship if I feel I'm only around for the other person to use? Am I able to use my thinking side over my feeling side well enough to know the difference?

I get called selfish quite often. It's funny; when I'm called that, I'm not feeling it. Most often, I'm feeling overwhelmed. You see, I'm called selfish most often in reference to my time. When I turn down invitations to social events. There's only so much of myself I can give. If I try to go beyond my limits, I end up cranky and snippy - who wants that? Is it selfish to recognize my limits and say no, knowing I may appear aloof and possibly conceited? I don't know the answers.

All I know for certain is I'm trying to find my way through this life the best way I can, and I won't always be able to please others. I'm trying not to feel guilty about that when it happens.

Las Vegas: Hot and Cold

2011-06-29T13:44:00.003-05:00

Las Vegas, you leave me hot and cold.

The hot summer winds sweeping down from the mountain leave my mouth dry in seconds. The sun beating down, relentlessly, glares off every surface. Sweat evaporates as soon as it appears. Then I walk indoors........ and I'm cold. Artificially-fabricated coconut scented arctic-feeling air streams from vents.

You are a city for beautiful people - at least on the strip, in the tourist area. Size 1 girls coiffed, made up and dressed to the nines stand in lines to shop, party, and drink. Men follow like puppy dogs. The nightclubs turn us mere ordinaries away, as we are not beautiful enough. Gorgeous girls in bikinis are everywhere: the hotel lobbies, taxi lines, walking the strip.

You are a city for old people. Elderly are as ubiquitous as the beautiful. Are you preying on their dreams of a more comfortable retirement by luring them into your gaming dens to steal their futures?

Your hotels reach for the sky, each new one trying to outdo the last: bigger, taller, swankier, sleeker, more technology.

Your service industry rolls. The people who serve others here do it well. I learned from a fantastic hair stylist yesterday that most of the people he knows who have completed college don't use their degrees. They go into the service industries and work for the casinos instead. The casinos pay more. He doesn't like living here; he has children and hates the constant barrage of sex, gambling and other vices they are exposed to every day.

Food - oh my gosh. How do you produce such fantastic-tasting delicacies in the middle of such an arid wasteland?

I love how you emerged from the mirage of the desert, making something of nothing. And what a something it is! Money built this town, it is clear. Money, greed, and ego. I look around and see - and hate - so many things geared toward the pursuit of pleasure, filling selfish needs.

Las Vegas, I can see why Stephen King cast you in The Stand. Yet I succumb, at least briefly, to your allure. Hot and cold.

Hotels and Me

2011-06-27T00:29:00.003-05:00

I was excited to stay at the new Cosmopolitan hotel in Vegas. It's sleek and modern; it's not trying to imitate a foreign city, no volcanos, no roller coasters.

I unlocked the door to the room and walked in. First glance, everything looks good. Spacious, nicely appointed. Then I opened the closet to unpack. Staring me in the face? Dirty men's dress socks.

Ok, the cleaning person missed them. They were in the closet; I can overlook that.

Next, I open the sliding door and step onto the balcony. Empty (dirty) drink glass, pack of cigarettes, full ashtray, miscellaneous wrapper. I won't be relaxing out there!

Bathroom is next. Half-used bottle of mouthwash on the sink. Long black hairs on the white rug on the floor.

Talked with my pal Sal, who has a room seven floors up. Her suite is great. Two bathrooms, no leftover stuff, and a view of the Bellagio fountains.

Why do I have such weird hotel karma?

Hospital Visits

2011-06-18T10:14:00.000-05:00

When I had surgery last year, I told friends and family to stay away. I only wanted my husband with me at the hospital. The reasons were perfectly selfish. I didn't want them seeing me out of it, in pain, and grouchy. I also did not want to feel the need to try to entertain anyone.

I know it's comforting for some people to be surrounded by family and friends when sick or hospitalized. I've found that for me it brings out my most polarized form of introversion: I don't want to deal with anyone except the person closest to me.

If this hurts anyone else (like my mom), I am sorry; but at the end of the day, the reason I'm there takes precedence over anyone's feelings except my own. If I'm not comfortable emotionally, I won't be comfortable physically. Ten years ago I could not have stayed strong in the face of all the best intentions of others thinking they needed to be there for me. I would have caved, had people buzzing around, and I would have been even more miserable than I already was.

I'm a little bit different after the "big C" experience than before, and that's not all bad. I'm less likely to put up with the things that bother me. If I don't have any interest in something, I give myself permission to acknowledge that and say no. If I do have a bit of interest but it makes me uncomfortable, I'm more likely to just try it. This last point is harder for me than the first two, I admit!

Do you like having visitors when you're ill? Do you enjoy visiting others when they're sick?

Image: Salvatore Vuono / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Mundane but Amusing

2011-06-14T19:38:00.000-05:00

Sometimes the most mundane conversations can provoke a smile (or giggle).

Me: "They couldn't get it up yesterday."
Boss: "They didn't drill properly?"
Me: "Apparently they didn't have the correct tools. Dick will be in Friday to get it up."

This was a recent conversation at work about installing whiteboards in a conference room.

Alive and Kicking

2011-06-03T10:04:00.001-05:00

June 1st was my one-year anniversary of my last chemo treatment.

I'm happy, of course. Relieved nothing has appeared during checkups and tests. Still scared it will come back. Terrified at times. Thankful for my life. Grateful I've been able to give back over the last year. Hopeful I will be able to continue to give.

Here's something from the playlist on my iPod that day:

A Winding Path

2011-05-23T10:04:00.000-05:00

I have a new post on Women of HR today: Leap (of faith). Although I knew what story I wanted to tell, it was a struggle to actually write it. I found it took much longer to do than any of the other posts I've done so far.

Part of the reason it was difficult is that my career path has been different than what is typically expected. I took a detour or two. Taking those detours may have hurt me in the eyes of some people. My resume doesn't show the typical progression an HR director normally has.

Those detours made a difference, though. I learned things I never could have if I had stayed on the straight and narrow career path. I met some wonderful, creative, giving, driven people who are making differences in their spheres of influence. I'm certain my exposure to them shaped me in a positive way that could not have happened if I hadn't varied my course. I wouldn't be where I am if I hadn't veered off my initial route. In the words of Smash Mouth's ubiquitous song, All Star:

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

Take some back streets. Explore the side streets. Take the interstate if you have to, but try to remember what you may be passing by.

Designer Cupcakes - The New Drug of Choice?

2011-05-21T10:17:00.000-05:00

photo credit: iStockphoto

Unless you've been under a rock somewhere, it would be hard not to notice the ascent of the cupcake to stratospheric status.

Cupcakes of my youth were staples of elementary school room mothers, who faithfully baked endless supplies for class parties. Plainly frosted, sometimes sprinkled with colored sugar, cupcakes were without a doubt kid food. It makes sense; they are small, easy to handle, and can be consumed without silverware.

Now, however, it's difficult to find the simple cupcakes of my childhood. Cupcakes have had a makeover - and a glamor makeover at that. They've gone designer. Entire shops dedicated only to the simple cupcake. Upscale ingredients like "madagascar bourbon vanilla" and "valrhona chocolate" stare at you from the menus. Extensive menus. You want raspberry-filled German chocolate? No problem. Salted caramel? You've got it. Bacon and maple syrup? Sure thing.

Adults now buy custom cupcakes in droves. Cupcakes are replacing traditional cakes at birthday parties, baby showers, graduation parties and more. I plainly admit, I don't get it.

The "cake" part of cupcakes is usually a bit dry. To me, there's nothing better than good, moist, homemade cake. Without frosting.

And here we come to the crux of the situation, I believe. I think people like this new brand of designer cupcakes because it's an easy vehicle for frosting. Lots of it. Piled high. Cupcakes now have more frosting and toppings than cake.

So, my theory is that adults like this cupcake makeover not because they're designer-pretty and look interesting, but because it's an easy way to consume a ton of frosting. Sugar high, anyone?

Wheel of Meat: Chemo Cargo

2011-05-11T18:25:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, out of the blue, I received notice from the very kind folks at Rockford Temple Rebekah Lodge #789 that they were going to do a fundraiser for Chemo Cargo.

"Wheel of Meat" Raffle

Friday, May 20, 2011

6:30 pm

at Murphy's Pub

501 South Perryville Road

Rockford, Illinois

Buy tickets to win your choice of hams, steaks, burgers, ribs and more.

If you live in the area, please consider attending to support Chemo Cargo and our efforts to provide comfort to chemotherapy patients.

Temple Rebekah is associated with the Independent Order of Odd Fellows. For more information, click here.

HRevolution 2011 - My First Time; Won't Be the Last

2011-05-03T22:11:00.000-05:00

Back from HRevolution 2011. What a great experience. Finally. I've wanted to attend since the very first one back in the fall of 2009 (but I was dealing with the stupid "C" word at the time). I watched it gain momentum and sent my coworker Sallie to HRevolution 2010 when I couldn't go yet again. I jealously followed the twitter stream, wishing I was there.

This time the timing worked. I met so many people I've followed on twitter for what seems like forever. I met people I haven't followed, but am following now. Amazing people who aren't afraid to give their opinions on the profession. Passionate people. People who aren't afraid to swear, and who love bacon. On everything.

Some of the fabulous twitter folks I was honored to meet:

@DaveTheHRCzar - Dave Ryan - Loved hearing about your cattle calls.
@sonar6 - Mike Carden - The performance debate was great. Thank you.
@TrishMcFarlane - Kudos for helping to organize this event. Great to meet you in person.
@awils - Amy Wilson - Thanks for joining us in the introvert corner at the tweetup!
@williamtincup - You're just as quirky in person as I imagined. Fantastic.
@BenjaminMcCall - Love your passion. Love it.
@ewmonster - Eric Winegardner -Thanks for the prize, and the best comment in the performance debate: "What do you need to do to be exceptional? Join a low-performing team."
@ArezooG - Loved talking with you about toxins in cosmetics. It's rare I find another person who knows what I'm referring to on this subject!
@HRstalker - Ruth Estwick - Fun lunch on the patio. Thanks for joining @smorgensen21 and me.
@bryanwempen - May 5th or 6th for Cinco de Mayo? Great to know. Seriously, loved meeting you.
@loismelbourne - Meeting fellow WoHR contributors was a high point for me. Looking forward to more conversations!
@sbrownehr - Steve Browne - You rock. Thanks for adding me to your email list. I was going to ask, so you saved me a step!
@RobinSchooling - Oh, the tiara was perfect! So good to finally meet you.
@HR_Minion - Shauna Moerke - I finally got a photo with Gir! I can't tell you how excited I was!
@lisarosendahl - Pleasure to meet you in person. Next time, we talk a bit more.
@designtwit - Lyn H - The bacon pimp. Wish I had been able to talk with you more.
@Frannyo - Franny Oxford - Another person I've wanted to meet (seemingly) forever. Glad to finally do so!
@controllergirl - Teresa Morris - Love your perspective. Hope to see you again.
@joningham - Great to meet you at the tweetup. Fun to have UK point of view.
@donnarogershr - Donna Rogers - Thanks for the information on ILSHRM and cattle calls. Hope we can connect again.
@davecarhart - Your optimism about the profession - and life - is great.
@TLColson - Tammy Colson - Glad to finally meet you in person. Love how expressive you are.
@ContentedCows - Bill, love the contented cows books. If I'd realized that you were one of the authors when you were sitting next to me, I would have told you then!
@SBLeaders - Mary Ellen Slayter - Thanks for "picking on" me during HR Slam. Yes, I can take it.
@ChinaGorman - Love your energy - and the skirt. Travelsmith - I remembered.
@TimJGardner - I didn't realize you were the HR Introvert at first. Great to meet you.
@luckypenny - Joni Doolin - What a great sense of humor!
@csarvich - Caryn Sarvich - Such a great perspective, loved talking with you.
@AprilBreeden - Thanks for joining us on the terrace, fellow introvert! Great meeting you.
@MikeHaberman - Practical and progressive thoughts - enjoyed listening.
@Incentintel - Paul Hebert - It felt like I met a legend in person. I was honored.
@HRFishbowl - Charlie Judy - Incomparable. So great to meet you.
@Kimberly_Roden - Your passion rocks. I'm looking forward to interacting with you more.
@RoseHRMaven - You are a true warrior. I admire you.
Jorden Bartlett - I hope you make your way out of HR and keep fighting to change the face of Corporation 3.0.

This list is by no means all-inclusive. So many people made impressions on me with their kindness and willingness to share.

The sessions were great. Informative. I'm still mulling over everything I've learned, letting it settle into my brain. I've returned to work more focused, more resolved than ever to pay attention to what's important - not what's urgent.

However, if you haven't guessed yet, the best part for me was the people. I'm shy and a bit awkward by nature, and events like this push me to my absolute limits. When asked by my coworkers what I found most valuable from the weekend, I was able to say, "Networking. And I loved it." The casual, intimate setting put me as much at ease as I could be. I want to participate again.

Steve Boese, Crystal Peterson, Trish McFarlane and Ben Eubanks: you did an awesome job organizing this event. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

This HRevolution community rocks.

What Does It Take to Do a Great Job?

2011-04-18T13:08:00.001-05:00

I was at McCarran International Airport in Las Vegas yesterday with my husband. It was 80s and sunny in Vegas, and 30s and snow here at home... Why did we fly back here again? Oh well, I suppose that's another topic. Anyway, after making our way through security (which surprisingly was only a 5 minute ordeal), we stopped at one of the restaurants for breakfast. It's fun to watch people while you sit, waiting.

One of the people I noticed was a cleaning staff member. His job, at least while I was watching, was to sweep up any litter he saw. You know what I'm talking about; you see these sweepers at all theme parks, malls, etc. This guy tried to sweep a piece of paper into his dustbin and it (the litter) didn't budge from the floor. It must have been a sticker. He pushed at it with his shoe, and it still didn't budge. At that point, he walked away.

I remember the staff at Disneyworld encountering something similar. They carried scrapers so they could make sure they got all of the litter - including gum.

It seems to me that is an example of a good portion of a great customer experience: you get the job done right, even if it means carrying additional tools and using a bit of elbow grease.

photo credit: istockphoto.com

Signs From the Universe

2011-04-08T20:15:00.000-05:00

It seems to me that people often say they've been given a "sign" when something happens to them. It doesn't seem to matter if it's positive or negative. A sign that you're going in the right direction, the wrong direction, someone likes you, someone hates you, something was meant to be, or something wasn't meant to be.

I know I've said it. Heck, I said it today. I think this is just something we tell ourselves to justify the feelings we happen to be having at that moment.

Life is random. It's not a highway taking a somewhat straight course from coast to coast. It's a series of back roads, with hairpin turns that sometimes backtrack. Perhaps the signs we think we are seeing are actually mile markers, the proof of progression through life itself.

Charitable Giving

2011-03-21T08:43:00.000-05:00

The featured blog post on FatWallet today is about charitable giving on a budget. At different times in my life, I found myself on the tight end.... and charitable giving was the last thing on my mind. I realize now what a loss that was. Focusing my attention on others less fortunate than I would have been a tremendous kick in the butt. A needed kick.

So, please read and let me know some of your creative ideas!

FatWallet: Charitable Giving on a Budget

photo: istockphoto.com

Thanks, Illinois, For Your Shortsightedness.

2011-03-10T15:21:00.003-06:00

credit: iStock photo

Disappointment is difficult.

Feeling betrayed hurts.

I was born and raised in Illinois. My husband and I made the conscious choice to move back here after his time in the Navy. Family, friends, and familiar places and faces all tugged at my heartstrings, and I convinced him this was the place to be. He didn't want to live here.

Time marched on, and we had additions to our family in the form of brothers-in-law, nieces, and a nephew. We found fulfilling, satisfying, challenging work. We contribute to our community through volunteering and monetary support of select charities. The company we work for invested in our community, taking an eyesore in Rockton and constructing a state-of-the-art facility that is comfortable and perfect for our workforce. We bought a house just a few miles away, conscious of the convenience and environmental impact of a short commute.

Today Governor Quinn signs into law HB 3659, which directly impacts our employer. FatWallet's advertising relationships with some large companies, such as Amazon and Overstock, will evaporate if FatWallet remains in Illinois. FatWallet has no choice but to move.

I've watched the debate play out in the press. I walk away from this fiasco more jaded than ever. There was no consideration about what really made sense; there was simply backroom politics, rhetoric, posturing, and in the end, politicians and lobbyists who got richer.

FatWallet will go on. The company will move to another state, and won't look back. Illinois will not realize the supposed gains this law tries to obtain. Politicians will get even more crooked. Big businesses will drive small businesses out of business. Way to go. It's not like Illinois needs the higher-paying jobs companies like FatWallet provide. Not at all. The void left by the 9,000+ affiliate marketers that will be affected can be filled by the wages WalMart pays, right Governor Quinn?

There are so many opinions being thrown left and right, and only a handful of people who truly understand the issue. Even people pushing hard for it didn't understand the consequences to so many legitimate, growing, tax-paying Illinois businesses. Of those who do understand, there are two camps: the people who see the irreparable damage done to the fast-growing, profitable affiliate marketing businesses in Illinois, the opportunities forever lost; and those who see that damage may be done, but feel that taking a stand may encourage other states to adopt similar bills - and ultimately think that the affiliate marketers are bluffing when they say they will leave Illinois.

If you knew that you were going to take a minimum 30% pay cut if you stayed, or you could continue to make the same or more by moving, what would you do?

Personally, I'm saddened by the state of affairs in my home state. I don't believe Illinois would be in the financial mess it is if we hadn't had so many crooks in elected offices over the course of my lifetime. Our government is no longer a government by the people, for the people. It's full of career politicians. It's enough to make me truly understand and feel the Revolutionary War was more than just a story in our past.

Tax Foundation
Blue Yonder - Affiliate Influenza
Performance Marketing Association

Women of HR

2011-03-09T08:37:00.000-06:00

Since last summer, I've been fortunate to be a part of the Women of HR community. It's a great group of people with varied experiences, making an interesting mix. I'm looking forward to meeting many of them in person at HRevolution in Atlanta.

Today, they're featuring one of my posts. It's titled "Who Signs Your Paycheck?" Please take a look and let me know your thoughts.

Coping With Sadness

2011-03-03T20:41:00.000-06:00

What do you do when you're sad?

Winter - the bitter cold, angry winds, gray skies, short days - sends me into a funk. I tend to fold into myself, becoming more introverted than my norm. Social interactions revert to a minimum. I don't want to leave the house.

One way i try to escape is through books. Curled up under a blanket, drinking tea, I can ignore the harshness of the season.

Music works sometimes, too, but it can be a double-edged sword. So many emotions are triggered by songs that listening to my library on random can be a roller coaster of highs and lows.

I wish I handled sadness in more constructive ways. Clubs or sports? I'll never be a social butterfly, nor will I be any kind of athlete. I'm awkward and clumsy, tripping over my own feet half the time. Would forcing engagement with others help? It is so tiring, exhausting, simply draining when I try.

A brief getaway to Florida last week was welcome and needed, so much more than I realized. I joked while there about absorbing enough sun to hold me until warmer weather hits our area. I didn't get nearly the amount necessary.

I'm hoping for a change in weather very soon. Are you?

My Soc Me Picks

2011-02-27T15:21:00.000-06:00

So you're wondering what the heck I mean by Soc Me picks. In honor of the Oscars, I'm sharing my thoughts on who I consider the stars of the HR social media space. These people know how to deliver jabs and uppercuts, and can tell it the way it is.

First on my list is Laurie Ruettimann, the Cynical Girl. Why? With a routine Google search for employee handbook, Punk Rock HR popped up on my screen. Her take on the subject, Punk Rock Employee Handbook, is pure and simple genius. I was hooked.

Jason Seiden is next. Want leadership or personal development advice? You'll find it, no holds barred, at Fail Spectacularly! Plus, he occasionally throws in free mp3 downloads of his very talented sister, Jackie.

Frank Roche has a no-bullshit approach on his blog, KnowHR. I still have his list of what he believes - and doesn't - about HR hanging on my office door.

Charlie Judy and his Trench HR outlook is practical, realistic, inspiring, and brave. Why brave? Actually, all these people have the courage and determination to change the profession for the better.

Lisa Rosendahl, Trish McFarlane, Shauna Moerke and all the Women of HR push the boundaries of accepted beliefs and practices in the HR field every day.

To hear the stories and beliefs of many more progressive HR folks who really get it, all you have to do is tune into DriveThruHR with Bryan Wempen and William Tincup every weekday, or listen to HR Happy Hour on Thursday evenings.

Of course there are many, many more people I could mention. These are the ones who originally inspired me; made me laugh, think and change my opinions.